Family
by kathrynlauryn
Summary: This is the story of Madison. How does this new doctor deal with her brother, her friendships and her brand new 'almost' relationship with her best friend.
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any characters associated with 'ER.' All characters are products of someone else's imagination and belong to NBC, et al. I do own the character of Madison.

This is my first fic and I've had it in my head for awhile and thought about writing it. This is my story and welcome suggestions, but remember this is my first fic.

FAMILY

You can chose your friends, but not your family. It's not just an adage, it's my mantra for life. My brother had a reputation for being an excellent pediatrician, but hated rules. He always did what he THOUGHT was the right thing and damn him, the consequences and anyone else he brought down with him.  
>He also had a reputation with women. He always attracted attention. I hated the thought of what would happen if anyone found out that we were related.<p>

As much as I loved him, I knew when I enrolled in med school, I couldn't let anyone outside our group of friends, know that I was his sister. Even his best friend figured it was a good idea. I was afraid the sins of my brother would unfairly judge me in the eyes of my teachers. So, all through school I was Madison Carrington. The dean of the medical school was sympathetic to my cause and made sure my correct name was listed at graduation. I knew I couldn't hide from his reputation when I started residency because, as luck would have it, I would be performing my residency in the very same ER my brother practiced.

I had worked in this ER before as a nurse, having gotten the degree through a vocational program in high school. I needed a way to pay for med school. I was used to the way the ER ran and knew most of the nurses thorough my work. None of them knew the secret I held. I was certain I'd be treated differently since my brother had probably dated half the nurses in the ER. He kept his distance from me and rarely gave me nursing orders. I was 'warned' when I first started in the ER about his reputation. I figured everyone took my distance for either disappointment that he didn't pay any attention to me or self-preservation. Either way, I wasn't compared to him, which was what I wanted.

I approached the desk as I had done many times before and asked for my lab coat.  
>Jerry stared at me like I'd grown three heads. "I don't have a lab coat for you, Maddie," he said. I went to the box and pulled out a coat with my name on it.<br>"That's not yours. It's got a different name on it," he said.  
>"It's mine trust me," I said. "This," I said, pointing at the lettering on the coat, 'Madison C. Ross, MD' "Is me," I said.<p>

I slipped on the coat and went to join my fellow med students, which included my best friend, John Carter.

"What did you do to Jerry," he asked when I came up next to him.  
>"He is shocked by the name on my jacket," I said.<br>Carter had discovered my secret when we were in medical school and he and I spent time together studying. He hadn't said anything to anyone and didn't find it weird. He and I studied at my apartment because Doug was usually at work or he was on a date, so our paths rarely crossed in that regard.

We were approached by our mentor for this phase of our residency, Dr. Mark Greene. He happened to be my brother's best friend.

He quickly introduced himself to those that didn't know him and paired us up with our higher level residents.

He approached me and introduced me to Dr. Susan Lewis. I knew Susan from my nursing days, but hadn't worked with her much.

"Maddie, what a surprise! You ready to get started," she asked.  
>"I sure am, Susan," I said.<p>

"Let's get started," she said. I looked back at Mark who mouthed 'good luck,' and went off with Susan.

"So are you from Chicago? I never got to talk to you much during your nursing shifts. Seems you usually did nights," she said.  
>"Yeah, medical school made me keep the hours pretty much nighttime. I was born and raised in Chicago. Obviously, I went to U of C for both undergrad and med school," I said.<p>

"What made you want to be a doctor," she asked.  
>"Because of my brother," I said.<br>"Oh, was he sick or something," she asked.  
>"No, he's a doctor. Pediatrician actually," I said.<br>"Really? Here in Chicago," she asked.  
>"I guess everyone will find out soon enough. My brother is a pediatrician here in the ER," I said, hoping she'd put two and two together.<br>We were standing at the desk, surrounded by pretty much the whole staff. Susan looked at me and her jaw dropped. "You're not serious," she said.  
>"Yeah. I'm Madison Ross. Doug Ross is my big brother," I said.<p>

"How can you be related to Doug," she asked.  
>"Same parents," I said.<p>

"I know, but you were down here working as a nurse and for med school and no one knew or picked up on it," she asked.  
>"Mark knows. Mark's known me since I was a little kid. Peter knows because he went to med school with Mark and Doug. I just wanted to do the med school thing on my own merit and I didn't want to have to deal with his reputation. One that I'm very familiar with. I love my brother and I live with him, but I don't have to accept what he does," I said, looking at her.<br>She smiled. "Doug's a good guy. Just a bit immature," she said.  
>"That's one way of putting it," I said.<br>We dropped the conversation and set about working up patients and I slowly learned the ropes of being an actual diagnostic physician in the ER.

When I had a break, Susan encouraged me to get out of the ER, so I slipped into the lounge and grabbed my coat. I was on the way out when I ran into Dr. Carter.  
>"John, what's Dr. Benton got you doing now," I asked.<br>"Grunt work. I'm actually getting ready to go to Doc Magoos. I have a whole thirty minutes for a break," he said, giving me a tired smile.

"No one said residency would be easy. Especially surgical residency. How about I buy the poor resident dinner," I said.

"I accept your offer, but I'll pay. I'm a struggling resident like you," he said.

"I'm not loaded like you, but I can pay my own way. I've been doing since I was 18. If Doug hadn't insisted on me taking his extra bedroom and needed a cook, I would have my own apartment. But at least he pays the rent," I said.  
>"How's everyone reacting to you being Dr. Ross' little sister? You having to explain it much," he asked as we made our way through the rain to Doc Magoos.<p>

"Yes I am. But I remind them I'm nothing like him," I said.

"Course not. You're prettier," he said, as he held the door open for me.

We entered the restaurant and sat down and ordered food.

We ate our food mostly in silence. A comfortable silence that we'd developed during med school when studied. Despite our obvious close friendship, we hadn't crossed that line and, knowing my luck with men, was doubtful we ever would.

We finished in a hurry and headed back into the ER. Just as we hit the doors, his pager went off. I took his jacket from him and watched him run up the stairs. I smiled and headed back into the lounge and found my brother seated at the table.

"How's it going, sis," he asked.

I hung my jacket and Carter's in my locker and turned to face my brother.

"I'm having fun. I'm sure when I'm doing a 24 hour shift in two days I'll think differently," I said, taking the cup of hot chocolate he had for me.  
>"We'll have to check out our schedules and see what we're working together," he said.<br>"You just want to make sure someone brings dinner when you're working," I said, smiling at him.  
>"You're a good cook," he said.<p>

I had long discovered that, unless I wanted to die young, I needed to figure out how to cook because Doug was, for the most part, a disaster. He knew three dishes and you lose your appetite if you eat them every single day. At least he knew how to do laundry and could keep the apartment clean.  
>"Well, you are paying the rent, so I guess I can cook to keep my room," I said.<br>"Funny," he said, getting out of his chair. "Did you just get done with dinner," he asked.  
>"Yeah. Actually, John bought dinner for me," I said.<p>

Doug smiled a sly smile at me. "Don't," I said.  
>"I'm just looking out for my sister. That's all," he said.<p>

I put my lab coat back on and went out the door.

I spent the rest of the overnight shift with Susan working up patients and presenting them to the attendings.

When the shift was over, I was exhausted but I admit, I loved the job.

I was getting my stuff out of my locker when I realized I still had Carter's jacket. I took it off the hook after hanging up my lab coat and went out into the hallway.  
>"Has Dr. Benton checked out, Jerry," I asked.<br>"Most likely. Are you looking for him," he asked.  
>"I have Dr. Carter's jacket. Just wanted to get it to him," I said.<p>

"Well, here comes Dr. Carter," he said. I turned around and found my friend walking toward me.  
>I handed him his jacket and he slipped it on, not saying a word.<p>

I said bye to Jerry and dragged the exhausted Carter out the door.  
>"You can't drive home like this," I told him.<br>"What am I supposed to do," he asked me.  
>"When are you back," I asked.<p>

"Tomorrow morning. I have a 48 hour call," he said.  
>"I have a 24 hour shift during the last 24 of your call," I said.<p>

"That's great. You can identify the body when Dr. Benton kills me," he said.  
>I suppressed a smile. "Peter's not going to kill you," I said. This earned me a glare from the tired intern.<p>

"Look, Doug isn't home. His girlfriend came in from her flight to Switzerland this morning so he's shacking up at her motel. You can come and sleep on the couch or you can take my bed," I said.  
>"I can't do that," he said.<br>"Yes you can. You can get some sleep and then you can get your car in the afternoon. I'd be failing in my duty if I let you go home like this," I said.  
>Realizing he was defeated, he nodded his head. "Lead on," he said.<br>I took his elbow and we headed up to EL station.

***I hope you like the beginning. I have an idea for where this story will go. Remember, this is my first fic, so please be kind.***


	2. Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any characters or anything associated with ER. They belong to NBC and others I am unable to recall. I own the character of Madison.

CHAPTER 2

The train ride took ten minutes. We walked down the stairs and I was certain Carter would fall asleep on his feet. We took the elevator up to the apartment I shared with my brother. I unlocked the door and pushed Carter inside.  
>"You want to shower first or sleep," I asked.<br>"Shower," he said.

"I'll get you some extra clothes and put them on the vanity," I said.  
>I lead him to my bathroom, which was connected with my bedroom, just like Doug's. I had refused to share a bathroom with him because of his slovenly nature and he'd wanted to avoid my scented lotions and candles.<p>

"Just make yourself comfortable," I said. I pulled some towels out of the bathroom closet. Carter thanked me and I went out to the kitchen. Doug had written a note telling me where he was, as if I could forget, and that he'd gotten the groceries before he left. I checked the fridge and it seemed he'd actually followed directions for once.

I slipped into Doug's room and pulled out a sweatshirt and sweatpants that probably belonged to Mark because they looked like Doug wouldn't fit into them. I set them on the vanity and got my extra clothes out of my room.

I heard the shower shut off, so I stepped into Doug's to take mine.

Ten minutes later, I dried off and put on my change of clothes and slipped into the living room. Carter emerged from my room drying his hair. "I had to call home. Didn't want anyone to worry about me," he said.  
>I smiled and grabbed two glasses from the cupboard. I poured him some juice and got him a bagel. I finished mine quickly and turned to him.<br>"You take my bed, I'll sleep in Doug's room," I said.  
>"I can't do that to you," he said, suppressing a yawn.<p>

"Come on before I have to carry you," I said. I walked him into my room and he crawled under the covers. "You could always share the bed with me," he said.  
>I shook my head and pulled the covers up around him. I went to wash the dishes and get some sleep.<p>

Carter was snoring in my room when I went into grab the quilt from the bed. I love my brother, but I wasn't about to sleep under his covers.

I leaned across Carter to grab the blanket. He must have felt me leaning across because he rolled over, his arm taking my waist and I fell across the bed, the weight of his body taking me down.

There was something comforting about feeling his arms around me, but I didn't want to dwell on it. Carter and I had a great friendship and neither of us wanted to spoil it, although we'd never actually talked about it.

I didn't have the heart to wake him, so I decided to stay where I was. I felt for the quilt and covered myself up with it. I feel asleep shortly and slept like a log for several hours.

Carter woke up and opened one eye. He felt a presence in his arms and looked at the face of his friend, Maddie. Just when he thought he was dreaming, he remembered that Maddie had invited him to use her apartment to catch a nap since he was so tired from his shift. How she had ended up in his arms in the bed, however, didn't make any sense to him. He hated to move, however, because the sight of her sleeping in his arms was something he'd been dreaming about for several months.

John didn't know when he noticed it. The two of them had been close friends during the med school days. Madison was the only person John had trusted with his secret. The secret that he was related to THOSE Carter's. The wealthy family with the house on the hill. He was the grandson and heir to the fortune. He had turned his back away from the posh and privileged upbringing to work as a physician. Something that was lost on his grandfather.

However, John felt real joy in his work and, truth be told, he didn't think philanthropy would give him the satisfaction. That is, if Dr. Benton didn't kill him first.

He knew Madison's secret before it was revealed to the rest of the hospital. He felt honored that she trusted him.

He knew often wondered if they could have a relationship that went beyond the close friendship they had together. He felt Maddie stir next to him and smiled.

I opened my eyes and caught him staring. I sat up in the bed with a start, causing my head to spin. John recognized the sign of vertigo and guided me back down on the bed.

"Easy. Sorry to startle you," he said.  
>"Why am I...oh now I remember," I said, laughing lightly.<p>

"Remember what," John asked.  
>"I came to get a quilt for Doug's room and you grabbed me and pulled me down on the bed. You were so tired I hated the thought of waking you up, so I just kinda laid where you dropped me. Did you sleep OK," I asked.<br>"I slept great. Must have been the company," he said, his eyes dancing.  
>"That or because you nearly got killed during your first shift," I said.<p>

John looked at me. Really looked at me. I looked at him. Really looked at him.

He looked so cute in the morning. I hadn't seen this side of him. Sure I'd seen him a bit tousled from our study sessions, but never in the morning and never after having shared a bed. I explained to him how I got into the bed with him and smiled. I saw he was looking at me. 'Probably repulsed and looking at something that won't make him gag,' I thought to myself. I looked at him, noticing his eyes and the softness that was there. John and I had spent so much time together during our study sessions that I couldn't believe I hadn't seen how cute he was before now. OK, I HAD noticed, but I wasn't about to do anything about it. Until I saw that look on his face.

I looked up at him and smiled, hoping he'd take it as an invitation to kiss me. He didn't disappoint.

Carter leaned down and kissed me. Carefully at first, as if testing the waters of our new found closeness. He closed his eyes and savored everything. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hoped he'd respond. He did. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me a little closer to him.

I don't know how long we stayed in my bed, kissing, but I heard Doug return home. My bedroom door was closed and Doug never entered my room. Carter pulled away and looked at me.

"He has wonderful timing," I said.

I put my head against Carter's chest and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"Guess I have to get up and get ready for my next shift," Carter said.  
>"Lucky for you there are scrubs at the hospital," I said.<br>Carter looked at me. "What," I asked.  
>"Nothing. Just noticing that's all," he said.<br>"I'm going to go see what Doug is doing home," I said. I grabbed my robe off the back of the door and exited my room.

"Hey, sis," he said.  
>"Hey. You working tonight," I asked.<br>"Just came home to get some clothes. I'm on tomorrow morning," he said.  
>"You coming back tonight," I asked.<p>

"Wasn't planning on it. Helga flies out in the morning, too, so I'll stay with her. You got plans," he asked.  
>"I'm on in the morning, too, for 24. You buying dinner, then," I asked.<br>"Sure. See you later," he said, grabbing his bag and kissing my forehead. "Love you, little one," he said before closing the door.  
>I went back into my bedroom and found Carter changing into his scrubs.<p>

"How would you like me to bring dinner to you tonight? I don't work until the morning," I said.  
>"You don't have to, Maddie," he said.<br>"Hey, no trouble. I bet I can even get Peter to let you off for a few minutes to eat it," I said.  
>"And how do you think you can do that," Carter asked, tying his shoes.<br>"I'll make his favorite. He can't refuse that," I said, smiling. 

Carter looked at the floor before looking back at me. "About that kiss...," he started.  
>"Don't. I liked it and I'm sorry Doug had to ruin that moment," I said.<br>"You liked it," he asked. I nodded and smiled.  
>"Great. I'll make sure we can do it again," he said.<br>"I'll bring you dinner tonight around 7," I said.  
>"That works for me," he said. He got off the bed and looked at me. I was suddenly very self-conscious about being short. He leaned down and kissed me again before opening the bedroom door. He grabbed his jacket from the chair in my room and headed to the front door.<br>I stood by the door waiting to let him out. "I'll see you in a few hours," he said.

"Count on it," I said. He kissed me again. "Bye," he said, giving me that cute smile before heading out the door.

I locked it behind him and wondered how I was going to explain this to my brother.


	3. Chapter 3

DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine. It belongs to NBC and other's I can't remember. I own Madison and the capers she finds herself.

Doug surprised me and came home that afternoon around 5. I had just returned from my run along the river and a few errands I promised Doug I'd handle.

"Hey! This is unexpected," I said, getting the stuff out of the fridge for dinner.

"Helga got called in for an earlier flight, so I thought I'd come home and see how you enjoyed your first day," he said, taking a bottle of water from the fridge.

"It was definitely interesting and challenging," I said.

Doug noticed the ingredients on the counter and asked what I was doing.  
>"You're going pretty big for dinner, especially since you weren't expecting me to come home. You're making your special blackened chicken salad," he said.<p>

"Yes. I promised a friend I'd bring dinner to them tonight," I said, turning my attention back to the chicken.

"That's nice of you Mads," Doug said. He headed for his bedroom. I thought I was home free when he stopped mid-stride and walked back to the counter.

"Wait. Who," he asked.

"I'm making dinner for Carter. He's pulling a 48 hour shift and I know Peter won't let him go and get dinner, so I told him I'd bring it to him," I said.

I put the still hot chicken in a bowl and started adding the lettuce and spinach that went in the salad.

"Oh, OK," he said, heading back to his room. He shut the door behind him and I heard him in the shower.

I took some containers out of the cabinet and added a generous portion of the salad into one and closed the lid.

I went to the closet and got out the picnic basket Doug had bought when he was trying to be romantic for some reason and put the stuff in there. I added several of the chocolate chip cookies I'd baked two days ago and had managed to keep because Doug hadn't been home. I added some bottles of water to the basket and some paper plates and utensils.

I put the basket on the coffee table and went into my room. I grabbed a quick shower. I pulled out a pair of jeans and black and white striped shirt. I slipped on a pair of sandals and pulled my still damp hair into a low pony tail.

I looked in the mirror and decided against applying makeup. While I was secretly thrilled that Carter had kissed me, I didn't want to appear too eager or like I was trying to impress.

I opened my bedroom door and found Doug in the kitchen. "Do I get to eat some of this," he asked. He gave me the puppy-dog look that I could only assume he gave to ANY woman to get what he wanted. I shook my head. "Of course, Dougie. I'll be back in a few hours. I'm going to take this to Carter and I'll make sure Peter knows he can enjoy some himself," I said.

I gave Doug a hug and grabbed my bag off the chair and slung it across my body. I took the basket and headed out the door.

The trip to the hospital was uneventful. I exited the EL and went down the stairs. I entered the hospital by the ER entrance. I waved to my new colleagues and headed for Jerry.

"Hey, Maddie. What are you doing here," he asked. I reached into the basket and pulled out a small bag of cookies I'd put together for him.

"I'm looking for Dr. Carter. Has he been down here," I asked.

"Lounge," Jerry said, taking the cookies and smiling at me.

I smiled back and headed to the lounge. I peeked into the window of the door and found Carter sitting on the couch. He looked tired already.

I entered the lounge. "Hey," I said, causing him to jump up, startled.  
>"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you or scare you or anything," I said.<p>

"It's fine. I'm waiting on a patient that's in ultrasound and Jerry's supposed to tell me when they're back," he said. He smiled at me and I felt my insides turn to jelly.  
>Now, I'll admit, that wasn't the first time that it happened, but I was suddenly acutely aware that he would know of my secret crush on him.<p>

I held up the basket and said, "Here's dinner. I even threw in some extra for Peter. There's egg salad in there. He LOVES my egg salad. Thought he might actually let you enjoy it if you have something to share with him," I said.

"Madison, you're amazing," he said.  
>I smiled. I figured it was just the lack of sleep talking, but I allowed myself to blush.<p>

He caught me by surprise by leaning down and kissing me. "Now, I think I can handle Dr. Benton," he said.

"You have to stop doing that or I'm going to get ideas," I said, turning and grabbing some coffee from the pot on the counter. I had no intention of drinking the stuff, but I needed to keep my hands busy.

"I thought you liked it," he asked.  
>"I do," I said, refusing to turn around.<p>

He was about to speak when Jerry came in and told him his patient was back from ultrasound. "Benton is on his way down," Jerry warned.  
>"Go. I'll take care of Peter. I'll let him know I brought him some food," I said. "See you later," he asked.<br>"Yeah. I'm on in the morning," I said.

He headed out the door and I took the basket with me and went out to wait for Peter.  
>I didn't wait long. The tall doctor exited the elevator and saw me. "Madison. I thought you were off tonight," he said.<br>"I am, but I brought you and your intern some dinner. Now, please make sure he gets to eat it. I brought my egg salad for you," I said.

Peter gave a small grin. "Thank you. I didn't know you and Carter were close," he said.  
>"We went to school together and had a lot of study sessions. I guess it's kind of stuck," I said.<br>"I'll make sure he and I eat this while it's still good," Peter said.  
>"Jerry, here will keep an eye on it," I said, looking at Jerry and shooting him an 'if you eat it you're a dead man' look.<p>

"I'll watch it and not let anyone touch it," Jerry said, taking the basket from me and putting it behind the counter.

"I'll let you get back to work. Tell Dr. Carter I'll see him in the morning. I'll get the basket later. Have a good night," I said.

I exited the ER walked across the ambulance bay when a car stopped right in front of me.

"You've got to help me, please," the passenger said.

They opened the door and I found they were covered in blood.  
>"What happened," I asked.<p>

"My ex-boyfriend went nuts and stabbed me. Just for being on a date with a new guy. I didn't see it coming," the woman said.

"Hey, I need some help out here," I shouted to a few of the techs that were taking their coffee break outside the ER.

One rushed inside and pulled a gurney out of the door and another helped get the patient out of the car.

I rushed behind the gurney and headed into the ER.

"Jerry, get Mark," I called as I rushed to Trauma 3.

I entered the Trauma room and immediately started assessing the patient, Carol Hathaway came in behind me and started helping me.

Mark came in a few seconds later. "Think we didn't have enough work, Mads," he asked me.  
>"I was heading home from bringing dinner to Carter and Benton and found this in the bay," I said.<br>"Start your assessment," he said.  
>I examined the patient and found a stab wound to the abdomen that caused me some concern.<p>

"Let's get an abdominal and chest CT. I'm worried about injury to the vital structures. Page surgery. I have a feeling this one is for them," I said.

"You don't have the scan back. Surgery won't talk to you," Carol said.  
>"Get them on the phone," I said, leaving no question that I was going to get my way.<p>

The patient was heading to CT when Carter came into the room.  
>"Someone page surgery," he asked.<br>I looked up from the chart. "Yeah, I have a surgical case for you. Woman was stabbed in the abdomen. I suspect she might have a nicked bowel. She's on the way to CT now," I said.  
>"I thought you were off," he asked.<br>"This kind of fell into my lap," I said.  
>Mark came back in. "Don't have a reading yet, but looks like she did suffer an injury to the small bowel and nicked the tip of her liver. She's all yours, Carter," Mark said.<br>"I'll let Benton know. See you later, Maddie and thanks for dinner," he said, giving her a quick smile before heading off to present to his attending.

"You can head home. I'll handle it. Good exam by the way. I've always been impressed with your clinical skills. You're going to be a great ER doctor," Mark said.  
>"Thanks, but you're a bit biased, don't you think," I asked as I stripped off my gloves and washed my hands.<br>"Maybe, but I am right," he said.

I said good night and headed back out the door.

I entered the Chicago night and headed for the EL station.

I entered the apartment and found Doug watching TV.

"Enjoy your dinner," I asked.  
>"I did. Your stuff's in the fridge," he said.<p>

"Thanks. You want to buy dinner tomorrow since we're both working," I said, sitting at the counter to eat my salad.

"Sure. I know you're off this weekend so are you..." he started.  
>"Bringing you dinner? Yes. I can make it and bring it to you while it's still warm instead of you packing it and taking it in when you leave. Do you have something in mind," I asked.<p>

"I'll let you know," Doug said, smiling as he entered his bedroom.

I headed into my room and changed into my pajamas. Doug and I were heading going in to work together tomorrow and I knew that would be weird.


	4. Chapter 4

DISCLAIMER: All character belong to NBC and other people that I have forgotten to mention, but nothing, except the character of Madison, belongs to me.

I awoke the next morning ready for the day. I showered and changed into my scrubs and grabbed my bag from my room. I went into the kitchen and a few minutes later, Doug exited his room.

"Morning. I made coffee," I said, handing him a cup.

"Thanks," he said.  
>We ate our bagels and read the paper in silence. It was a routine that we'd always felt comfortable. We headed out the door and to the EL station. We boarded the train and waited for our stop.<p>

I turned to my brother and asked him a question.

"Does it bother you to have your little sister living with you," I asked.  
>"No. I know it took some adjustment, but you were getting ready to start high school when you and I moved in together. I like having you around," he said.<p>

"Thanks. I just wondered if you were going to make me move out now," I said.  
>"Only if you want. Just because you finished med school doesn't mean anything. Besides, you do your thing and I do mine. You're my sister and I'm going to support you," he said.<br>"What if I started seeing someone," I asked.  
>He looked at me. "Something I should know," he asked.<br>"Not right now. I mean I don't know. Let's just say that I have a feeling that I'm going to be seeing someone in the near future," I said, not wanting to let Doug know what was happening.

"Well, we'll figure that out. Our shifts aren't exactly going to overlap much. I'll give you your space," Doug said.  
>"It's not like you don't have plenty of places you could go," I said.<br>We got off the EL and went toward the ER.

We stopped to grab coffee at the stand near the hospital. "I got a letter from dad," I said, watching Doug's reaction.

"Really? What did the old man have to say this time," he asked.

"He said he had something for me for a graduation present," I said as we returned to walking.

"Did he say what it was," he asked.  
>"Yeah. The letter included a deed to a house. A brownstone actually. He said he owned it and was giving it to me," I said.<br>Doug stared straight ahead. I knew what he was thinking. "Wonder if it's real," he said.  
>"I dropped it off yesterday with a real estate attorney. He's supposed to research it and get back to me," I said.<br>"How do you know a real estate attorney," he asked as we entered the ambulance bay.

"Daniel. His father's an attorney. I called Daniel and he asked his dad if he would look at it for me," I said.

"You going to move into it if it is yours," he asked.  
>"Don't know. I want to look at it first. I mean, if it is mine, it's gotta cost a fortune in everything from heat to electricity to furnishing," I said.<br>"Let me know what he says," Doug said.

We entered the lounge and saw Mark and Susan.  
>"Hey," I said, hanging my stuff in my locker and taking out my lab coat.<br>"Mads, what time you want dinner," Doug asked.  
>"Find me when you're ready," I said and he nodded.<p>

He left the lounge and headed into the foray of children waiting for his expertise.

"I still can't believe it, but, seeing you two together, I can see the resemblance," Susan said.

"Huh," I said, looking to Mark.  
>"She still can't get over you're Doug's sister," he said.<p>

"Ah. Well, I am," I said.

"It's just so weird. I mean, you're nothing like him," she said.  
>I looked at her and smiled. "How do you know that? I could be a real Casanova with the men in my life," I said.<br>Mark started laughing.  
>"I don't see it. But you do look a lot alike," she said.<br>"Yeah. I see it every time I look in the mirror. I'm just glad that no one knew before now," I said.

Susan and I went off to begin our shift. The shift was somewhat crazy, but I was finding I enjoyed the chaos and the challenges.

I didn't see Carter until nearly 3 in the morning, four hours before our shifts were to end.

"Maddie," he said.  
>"Carter. What are you doing down here? Did someone need a consult," I asked.<br>"No, I wanted to thank you and this is the first time I've been able to get away," he said.  
>"It wasn't any trouble," I said.<br>"Can you wait after your shift," he asked.  
>"I suppose. I'll come up the surgical when I'm finished with my shift and have signed out," I said.<br>"Perfect," he said.

He turned around and headed back for the elevators, no doubt trying to make sure Peter didn't know he'd left the floor.

I finished my shift and signed out my patients to the oncoming set of residents. I had three days off and didn't have any idea how I'd managed that, but I wasn't going to complain. Doug had the next twelve off before he was back for the twelve hour night shift for the next two days.

I grabbed my stuff and headed up to surgical. I told Doug to go on without me.

I stood by the desk and chatted with the nurse. By now, everyone in the hospital knew I was Doug Ross' sister and everyone had questions.

Carter came around the corner and, despite his bedraggled appearance, smiled brightly when he saw me standing there waiting for him.

"Hey. I have some charting to finish. Don't know how long that will take, so you should just head home," he said.

"You sure? I don't want you to fall asleep while you're driving," I said.

"No worries," he said, before leaning down and saying in a whisper, "I'll call the family driver. I'll meet them at the corner and head home," he said.

I smiled. Carter's little secret was safe with me.

He motioned for us to head into the lounge.  
>"You want to get together this weekend? We can continue what we were discussing the other morning," he said.<br>"I'd like that but you should know something first," I said.  
>Carter looked at me. I leaned close to him and said in his ear, "I don't have much experience with guys."<p>

Carter looked at me confused.

Wishing the exhaustion wasn't playing such havoc with Carter's brain, I said it in plain English. "I don't get out with guys often, particularly with Doug as a brother. I'm not as...experienced...as my brother is," I said.  
>The realization hit Carter and he nodded. "I understand. You want to go out this weekend," he asked.<br>"Yeah," I said.

Catching me off guard, Carter leaned down and kissed me. I was shocked by the boldness of his gesture. We pulled away and headed out the door together, not knowing that Dale Edson had entered the lounge while our backs had been to the door. Neither of us knew how much of the conversation he had heard.


	5. Chapter 5

DISCLAIMER: Only thing I own is the character of Madison. Everything else belongs to someone else.

I headed down the stairs and was going to the EL station when I heard Dale call my name. "Madison!"

I stopped, rolling my eyes, before I turned around.  
>"Dale. What do you want? I'd like to get some sleep," I said.<br>"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. How about we grab some breakfast and then I help you with that," he said.  
>"No way, Dale. I've told you before, I'm not interested," I said.<br>"Come on, Madison. It'll be fun," he said, coming closer to me.  
>"I don't think so. Now I've got to go," I said. I turned and ran up the EL station steps, hoping to grab a seat so I wouldn't have to wait for the next one. I slipped into the EL with seconds to spare before the doors closed. I saw Dale on the platform and waved as I sighed in relief. That guy didn't know how to take no for an answer.<p>

I entered the apartment and went straight to the shower. I took a quick one and collapsed on the bed.

I was awakened that evening around 7 by my brother knocking on the door. He poked his head in and smiled at me. He closed the door quickly when he saw the pillow coming at him.  
>"Sorry, Mads, but you have a phone call," he said.<p>

I groaned and grabbed the extension on my side of the bed. Since I wasn't on call, I had turned the ringer off in my room. I figured if it was important, someone would leave a message.

"'ello," I said.

"Maddie! You were sleeping, weren't you," I heard Carter ask.  
>"Yeah, but shouldn't you still be asleep," I asked.<p>

"I'm surprisingly not tired now. I slept for about eight hours and then got up and went riding. I just wanted to know if you were interested in going riding tomorrow," he asked.  
>"Yeah, but I've never been riding before," I said.<br>"No problem. How about I pick you up around 7 tomorrow morning," he said.

I wondered exactly what I was getting myself into and I decided to take a chance. "OK. See you at 7. You will provide this woman with coffee, won't you," I asked, teasing him.  
>"Of course. I might even throw in some breakfast. I'll meet you downstairs," he said.<br>"OK, John. I'll see you in the morning," I said.  
>"Bye, Maddie," he said.<br>I hung up the phone and got out of the bed. I went to the bathroom and then padded into the living room to find, to my surprise, Doug sitting on the couch watching a baseball game and eating pizza.

"Thought you'd have a date," I said, stealing a piece of pizza from him.

"I thought I'd hang out tonight. Figured you'd be sleeping the rest of the night. What did John want," Doug asked.  
>"He wanted see if I'd go on a date tomorrow morning," I said.<br>"Really? That's a surprise," he said.  
>"Why," I asked, grabbing a soda from the fridge.<p>

"Just didn't see it happening between you two, that's all. Figured it would have happened before now if it was happening at all," he said.

"Thanks," I said. I settled down on the couch to watch the ball game with Doug. We both went to bed a few hours later. I said bye to him before I went into my room because I figured he'd sleep while I was on my date.

I woke up early and went downstairs to grab a cab. I was surprised to find Carter downstairs already, waiting in his Jeep at the curb.

"Morning," I said, smiling as he opened the door for me.

"Good morning. Are you ready," he asked, standing in the doorway.

"I guess," I said.

He got into the driver's seat and we headed off toward his house.

I spent a great morning riding around the estate with John and then we had a picnic for lunch.

"John this has been really fun. I've never done anything like this before," I said.

"Well, I'm glad you've enjoyed yourself. I've been wanting to go out with you for quite a while," he said, looking down at his feet.

I smiled. I bent down and caught his eyes. "I've been wanting to go out with you for a while myself," I said.

Carter smiled and took my hand. We started walking back to the main house, making small talk along the way.

We reached the rose garden. I'd been to Carter's house a few times during medical school, mostly as an escort to some function and as a way to keep his family from pestering him about his life. "I love this garden. I've never seen anything like it before," I said.  
>"My grandmother is very proud of it," he said.<p>

I turned around to look at the red roses. "Maddie," he said.

I turned back around and Carter handed me a white rose. The sweet gesture caught me by surprise. "Carter," I started to say, before he silenced me with a kiss.

A wonderful kiss. I was just starting to lose myself in his kisses when a pager went off. Both of us pulled away, my cheeks more than a little red. "Was that yours of mine," he asked, reaching for his pager.

"I think it was mine," I said, pulling my pager out of my bag. Despite not being on duty, we were still required to carry our pagers, just in case we were needed to fill in or there was a disaster. We were never truly off duty unless we were on vacation and out of the city.

"Can I borrow the phone," I asked.  
>"Of course," Carter said, taking me inside the house and showing me to the phone in the hallway.<p>

"Hey, Jerry, it's Madison. Why was I paged," I asked.  
>"Hold on. Talk to Dr. Greene," Jerry said.<p>

I heard the phone being passed to Mark and he immediately came on the line.  
>"Hey! I called your apartment and Doug said you were out for the day. Sorry I had to page you, but I need you to come in and work for a few hours. We're short a resident and you're on the list," Mark said.<br>"List? Remind me to tear up that list. Can you give me an hour to get there," I asked.  
>"Course, Maddie! I'll have you out of here as soon as we get out from under," Mark promised.<br>I hung up the phone and turned to Carter. "I have to go. Mark needs me to work for a few hours," I said.

Carter feigned disappointment. "You sure you didn't plan that," he asked, grinning.

"Yeah. You're an awful date," I said, smiling back.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and we shared another kiss before he pulled away and said he'd take me back to my apartment.

When we arrived at my apartment, he opened the door for me and said, "Call me when you get done and we'll plan another date. If you want."

"I'd like that," I said. We shared a quick kiss and I headed up to my apartment and changed clothes. I decided to take my car since I didn't want to have to wait for a train.

I headed down to the parking garage in our building. I hopped into my little car and headed for the hospital. I had a smile on my face as I drove into work and I knew Carter was responsible.


	6. Chapter 6

DISCLAIMER: I own Madison. Everything else belongs to someone with more money and talent than I.

I went into the lounge and hung my stuff in my locker. I pulled on my lab coat and wrapped my stethoscope around my neck and headed into the fray.

"Maddie! You are saving us. Grab a few charts and present to whomever you can find. Let me know if you have any trouble," Mark said, hugging me as he headed off to see a patient.  
>I took a chart, greeted my fellow residents and headed off to see a patient.<p>

Five hours later, my feet were killing me and I was beyond tired. Mark found me grabbing a cup of coffee in the lounge.

"Maddie, thanks again. You can sign out whenever you're comfortable. And you don't have to work tomorrow night. We can handle it without you," he said.  
>"Thanks, Mark," I said.<p>

I went back out and signed my patients out and headed toward the parking garage.

I went to the parking garage, silently cursing myself for parking in the garage on such an isolated level. I knew I was going to be coming out at a late hour, I should have gotten an escort from security.  
>As I stepped into the parking level, the sound of my shoes hitting the concrete was exaggerated by the size of the garage and the lack of cars in the level to muffle the sound. This made my senses fire on high alert.<p>

I headed toward my car, wrapping my lab coat around myself to fight off the chill that I hadn't noticed earlier in the day. The walk to the car seemed to take forever.

Just when I was within steps of the door, I felt someone behind me. I quickly turned around and didn't see anyone. When I turned back around, a masked man was in front of me. Before I could react, he taped my mouth with hospital silk tape. He whispered in my ear, "I'm going to take it from you."

I tried to squirm away from him, but the grip was too strong. He dragged me to a corner of the garage that I was certain wasn't covered by the cameras. He used plastic ties to bound my hands before he pushed me back against the wall.  
>I tried fighting him, but was met with a fist or a kick for my trouble. When I was near the point of passing out, I slumped to the ground. My attacker then proceeded to violate me in the most horrendous way.<br>When he was finished, I was unable to do anything but moan in agony. He proceeded to kick and beat me until he was satisfied that he'd left a mark I'd never forget. He leaned closer and whispered, "Don't tell a soul what happened. I know where you are and I'll get you again before the cops find out."

He cut the twist ties off when I fell unconscious and left me in that corner.  
>I don't know how long I was there, but when I came to I felt awful. I was nauseated and bleeding from my nose and mouth. I felt like a bloody mess. I tried to stand, but the nausea and pain sent me back to the ground. I crawled slowly out of the corner and the shadows into the parking garage driving lane, hoping I could get to the elevator. I got out far enough to be seen before I blacked out again.<p>

I didn't remember much about the attack, especially since my head had been slammed against the concrete wall during the altercation.

I don't know how long I was unconscious. The only thing I remember was waking up in the trauma room in the ER, the patient of a brutal beating and horrifying rape.

I opened my eyes and immediately closed them, regretting the previous action. Everything hurt. I turned my head, hoping to block out the light that seemed to follow me in my sleep.  
>"Mads, can you hear me," I heard my brother ask. The light moved and I turned back to face him. I opened my eyes again, relieved it wasn't as bright as it had been the first time.<p>

"Hey, Dougie," I said, trying to smile, but that action caused me to wince.

"Yeah, munchkin, don't do that. You got beat up pretty badly. I don't know what happened, but Mark and these guys are going to fix you up," he said, his eyes glassy and full of emotion.

"How bad," I asked, feeling like I had a mouth full of cotton.

"You're alive. Let's focus on that," he said.  
>I closed my eyes. I was in too much pain to argue. I heard Doug talk to Mark.<br>"Hey, Maddie, you want to look at me," Mark said.  
>I rolled my head toward his voice and opened my eyes, trying my best to fight the nausea that was waging in my stomach.<p>

"You have a concussion. You also have some cracked ribs. You lacerated your spleen. Peter's going to watch your levels and take you to the OR if necessary. He wants to observe you because of the head injury. You also have a broken jaw and nose along with a broken lower right leg and broken left ankle," he said.

I closed my eyes. I had been beaten horribly, but I couldn't remember what happened. I remembered parts but apparently I had blocked the attack out of my head.

Mark and Doug talked across the bed at each other and I tuned them out. I was hurting and wanted nothing more than to sleep on a comfortable bed and have this be a horrible nightmare.

"Can I see her," I heard someone ask. I don't know if it was the distance the person was from the bed or the drugs, but I couldn't make out the voice.  
>"Sure. She probably wants to see you," my brother said.<br>"Hey, Maddie," said a voice I was trying to place.  
>"Don't scare me like that," he said.<br>Then I remembered the voice. It was that of my fellow resident and the guy I had gone on a date with the day before this happened.  
>"Carter. Had to make sure you were still interested," I managed to say through the cotton ball feeling in my mouth.<p>

"I've been interested. Just thought you were playing hard to get," he said, taking my hand.  
>If I had opened my eyes, I would have seen the concern in his eyes at what happened.<p>

I squeezed his hand. "You still want that second date," I asked.  
>"If you'll go out with me again," he said.<p>

"Carter, we're going to take her up to the ICU, right after we splint those fractures," Mark said.  
>"Are you going to stay with her," Carter asked Doug.<br>"Yeah, but you're more than welcome to stay with her also," Doug said.  
>"I'm staying," Carter said.<br>Mark ordered more pain medication to be administered and I was soon in a warm cocoon of drug induced euphoria.


	7. Chapter 7

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing except for Madison. The creative genius behind ER and it's characters does not belong to me. It belongs to NBC and numerous others. This is purely for enjoyment and entertainment.

I was wheeled to my ICU room on a stretcher, but I slept through the entire process.

I slept in between in the poking and prodding of blood draws and vital signs, everyone waiting to find out if Peter would have to take me to the OR.

Doug left the room to get him and Carter some coffee. Carter took a look at the vital signs displaying on the machine and he was becoming alarmed. He noticed my heart rate was increasing, despite my pain medication having been given a few minutes before.  
>He jumped up from his chair and headed out to the nurses desk.<br>"Have Madison Ross' tests come back," he asked.

"I think I have those right here," the nurse said.  
>"Can I see them," Carter asked.<br>The nurse looked at him. "Please. I think Madison is bleeding again."

She handed the results to Carter and he quickly realized I was bleeding again.  
>"Call Dr. Benton. Now," he said.<br>The nurse looked at him. Without waiting for a reply he dialed Peter's pager and had him call the ICU.

"Dr. Benton, you need to get up here. Madison's heart rate is increasing and I think her H&H is dropping, but I don't have all the results," Carter said.  
>Benton hung up the phone without saying a word and ran to the ICU.<p>

He arrived in the unit just as Doug was assessing his sister.  
>"Peter, she's bleeding. Carter's right," Doug said.<br>Peter did a quick exam and looked at Carter. "Tell them to get the OR ready. Sorry, Doug, I'm going to have to take out her spleen," Peter said.  
>Doug nodded and went to the nurses desk with Peter. Dr. Anspaugh was on duty with Peter and he made his way to the ICU when Carter called to assemble the OR team.<p>

"What's going on, Dr. Benton," Anspaugh asked.

"Madison's spleen is still bleeding. Carter noticed her increased heart rate and her H&H is trending down. I'm going to do an ex-lap," Peter said.  
>"Doug, did you sign the consent," he asked.<p>

Doug nodded.  
>"Carter, I didn't know you were on duty tonight. Come on, let's scrub in," Anspaugh said.<br>Benton stopped him. "Carter's not on duty," he said.  
>Anspaugh looked at Carter. Carter swallowed. "Madison and I...Madison and I are...Maddie is my girlfriend," he managed to get out.<p>

Anspaugh smiled at the young intern. "You can watch in the observation lounge," he asked.

Carter nodded and they headed off to the OR. Anspaugh turned to Doug. "You can watch in the observation lounge, too. We'll take good care of her," Anspaugh said as he followed after the stretcher.

**CARTER'S POV**

I sat in the chair in the ICU, watching the woman that had become my best friend during medical school. Maddie was closer to me than anyone had been to me in my life. Even the women that I'd dated, never made me feel like Maddie did.

I closed my eyes and replayed the last 16 hours over in my head.

I'd had a wonderful time with Maddie at my house and was hoping it was the start of a relationship. A relationship I had wanted for a while now.

I'd gone to sleep that night, dreaming of Maddie and our kisses.

When my pager went off at 2:30 in the morning, I was worried I'd forgotten something. I recognized the number as that of the ER and wondered why they were paging me.

I called the number and Jerry answered the phone.  
>"Jerry, it's Dr. Carter. Someone paged me? I'm not on call. They know that, right," I asked.<br>"I paged you for Dr. Ross," he said.

I smiled to myself, thinking that Maddie had paged me for something. I was surprised when Doug got on the phone.

"Carter. Madison's been attacked. She's here in the ER. I thought you might want to know," Doug said.  
>I felt my breath leave my lungs. I couldn't speak. I thought I'd heard him wrong.<p>

"What," I asked.  
>"Mads is in the ER. She's in a trauma room," Doug said, his voice a combination of anger and sadness.<p>

"I'm on my way," I said, hanging up the phone and not bothering to wait for Doug's reply.

I threw on a shirt and jeans that were probably dirty and I rushed to my car. The night butler saw me and asked what I was doing.

"My girlfriend's been injured. I need to get to the hospital. Will you inform everyone when they get up," I asked.  
>He nodded and I headed out of the drive and toward the hospital.<p>

When I arrived, the mood of the ER was tense. I knew everyone was concerned for Madison and also because of her brother's position as a staff physician.

Jerry pointed to the trauma room Madison was in and I headed there. I stood outside the door looking in the window at the flurry of activity around the bed.

Madison was surrounded by Mark and Peter. A gang of nurses was around her bed checking IV lines. I saw the blood on the white sheets. My heart broke for her.

I pushed open the door and Doug immediately looked up.

He approached me. "What happened," I asked.  
>Doug took a deep breath. "She was in the parking garage. Someone attacked her. The beat her. Broke her jaw, leg, ankle. She's got some deep lacerations, cracked ribs, broken nose. Peter thinks she has a lac to her spleen that might be stable. He'll observe with blood levels," Doug said.<br>I could tell there was something else Doug wasn't telling me. "What else," I asked, afraid of what he would tell me.

"Do you care about my sister," Doug asked.

"Yeah. I think we could have a great relationship, if she'll have me," I said.  
>Doug took a deep breath. "That bastard raped my sister. There was no concealing of the evidence. He brutally beat AND raped my sister," Doug said, through clenched teeth and tears.<p>

Again, for the second time that night, my breath left my body. I actually fell back against the counter in the trauma room. To think that someone could do something like that to someone as sweet and innocent as Madison, made me ill.

"Does she know," I asked.  
>Doug shook his head. "No. She has a concussion. Mark thinks she'll probably block it out, but, if you're going to be around her when she's not at work, then you should know what happened. Just in case she has a flashback or something," Doug said.<br>I prayed Madison would never remember the details of her rape. I prayed she'd never find out about it, but I knew she would probably have to be told because of all the follow up testing they would have to do.

I went to the side of the bed and found her semi-conscious and trying to keep her eyes away from the light.

After Doug and Mark talked, I started speaking with her. Madison looked up at me as best she could with her swollen face.

Maddie started making jokes and I wanted to cry. She was trying to calm both Doug and I down when she was the one in pain.

Doug told me I could stay in her room with him and I was grateful. Truth be told, I'd probably have camped out in the hallway if he hadn't.

I was acutely aware of all the monitors and the readouts. I was watching Maddie sleep when I noticed her pulse rate increasing and blood pressure dropping. It wasn't jiving with the fact that she was getting pain medication. I suspected she was bleeding. I went out to the nurses station to tell them what I suspected.

When Anspaugh and Peter took her to surgery, I followed Doug to the observation lounge.

Watching them operate on Madison made me sick to my stomach. I'd observed surgery during medical school and seen hundreds of gruesome procedures. But this was Madison. This was someone I cared a great deal about on the operating table and I was scared to death of what they might find or what could happen. Sometimes too much knowledge is a bad thing.

Doug sat stoic in the chair, watching the surgeons work their magic. I turned to the window, willing myself to watch.

When the operation seemed over, Benton turned to the window and nodded his head. Doug and I released a breath we were both certain we hadn't known we were holding.  
>"She's going to be OK," Doug said, the relief showing on his face.<p>

I didn't say a word. Doug patted me on the shoulder. "How about we get some coffee," he asked.  
>"Sounds good," I said, the tension rolling off of me.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but Madison. ER and its characters belong to NBC Universal and others I can't remember off hand.

I woke up a day after my surgery and met with a fog of confusion.

"Do...ug," I croaked out.

He was by my side in a second. "Mads. I'm here," he said.

My throat hurt. I didn't register what happened and felt another hand squeezing mine.

"Car...t..er," I managed to get out.  
>"Yeah, Maddie, I'm here, too," he said.<br>I closed my eyes, suddenly acutely aware of the pain. Almost immediately, I felt the warmth and fog of pain medication. I opened one eye and saw my brother and boyfriend looking at me.

"That better, Mads," Doug asked.  
>I merely closed my eyes and sank back into the pillow. I heard whispering above the bed, but was too tired to make out what they were saying. I felt a weight on my legs and found them difficult to move.<p>

"Wha...hap...d," I managed to ask.

"You had to go to surgery. Peter took out your spleen. You're going to stay in ICU for a day or two and then ortho's going to take a look at that ankle," Carter said.

I wasn't sure if he said anything else because I fell back asleep a few minutes later.

5 days later

It had been five days since my attack in the parking garage and the police had no idea who had attacked me. I'd gone to the OR three days after my spleen was removed to have my ankle set. I was told I'd be allowed to go home, if I took it easy. I wouldn't be allowed back to work for six weeks and I secretly wondered what that would do to my status as a resident. Kerry assured me that I would be able to make it up in the summer and was also working to see if any of my nursing shifts could count as those hours. I was grateful for the support.

I went home that afternoon to my apartment I shared with Doug.

"OK, Mads. Do you want to go to the couch or your room," he asked.  
>"I'll take the recliner. It's easier for me," I said.<br>Doug helped settle me into the recliner. "Why couldn't I have broken a leg and ankle on the SAME side," I said out loud. I had been using humor in my situation to make things easier for everyone to deal with and Doug was helping me.  
>"You always were different," he said.<p>

I rolled my eyes and adjusted myself in the chair.

"Carter said he'd bring you dinner tonight. He's got off a 24 this morning and he's off the next two days," Doug said.

I nodded. "You going to stick around," I asked.  
>"Nope. Carter promised he'd stay with you in case you need anything and it's not like you can do anything with those casts and your stitches," Doug said.<br>I rolled my eyes at my brother. I was about to say something when the door to the apartment opened. "Hello," Carter called.  
>"We're in here, Carter," Doug said.<p>

Carter came into the living room and was holding a bouquet of flowers. They just so happened to be daisies and tulips, my favorite flowers and a card with a picture of a sun. It was a nod to my nickname Carter had given me in med school.

Doug took the flowers from Carter and put them in a vase and put them on the coffee table. "I'm out of here. Love you, munchkin," he said, kissing the top of my head. "Carter, watch her," he warned.  
>"Of course," Carter said.<p>

Doug closed the door behind him and I looked at Carter. "Did you bring dinner? Please tell me you brought something that tastes like food. I mean, really like food," I said, hoping that sack he had was something from my favorite restaurant.  
>"Now, I know you'd like to have the fajitas, but that's a but much for some who has had surgery, so I got you the taco salad, minus the hot stuff. It's flavored the same, but not as spicy," Carter said, presenting me with a bowl of salad and a large Coke with extra ice.<br>"You are too good to me," I said, smiling at him. He leaned down and we shared a kiss, something I hadn't realized I'd missed so much since my assault.

Carter sat on the couch and we ate our food in silence. The smell and taste was amazing, especially after nearly a week of hospital food and whatever Doug thought I needed to eat.

"Can you help me to the couch," I asked.  
>"Why," he asked.<br>"I want you to hold me, John. That's all I want. It's what I've needed all week," I said.  
>He carefully helped me out of the chair and carried me the few feet to the couch.<p>

He sat me down and then sat down next to me. I put my head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around me.  
>"Better," he asked.<br>"Much," I said and promptly fell asleep.

Carter was pretty much a constant visitor during the four weeks I was forced to stay confined in the apartment. He came over after every one of his shifts and basically moved in with me. We were enjoying getting to know each other and finding out why we liked each other. Our relationship seemed to deepen and we found a connection. A connection I happened to like.

The day Doug took me to get my doctor appointment I was elated. Not to visit the doctor but to find that I was allowed to be out of my apartment. Carter had taken me for a few elicit trips to the river when he came by to visit.

Carter met Doug and I outside the doctor's office. He'd just finished his shift and was waiting patiently in the waiting room for us to come out.

"Hey, cast is off the leg," he said, after greeting Doug with a hi.

"Yeah. He's letting me go back for a few shifts, as long as I don't stand on my feet too long. I have to start some physical therapy tomorrow, which is going to be hell," I said.

"Won't be too bad, Maddie," Carter said.  
>"Carter, you want to take her back home? I have to head into work," Doug asked.<br>"Of course. Want to get something to eat," Carter asked.  
>"I'm famished," I said.<br>Doug hopped into his car and headed off to the hospital. Carter helped me into his Jeep and we went in the opposite direction.  
>"You getting bored with me yet," I asked him.<br>"No. I'm waiting for you to get better," he said.  
>"He took off the cast and replaced it with a removable boot. I can shower again, so you'd better watch out. I'm just glad my jaw wasn't broken as badly as they first thought," I said.<br>"Me, too," he said, suddenly quiet.  
>I knew what was bothering him. It was the same thing that was bothering my brother. He was scared.<p>

Hell, I was scared. I didn't have any clue why I was targeted. I didn't remember much of my attack. I'd had a few flashbacks of what happened before that event, but nothing certain. I still didn't know what happened. I knew why he didn't want to say he'd been scared. Saying it nearly made the emotion more palpable.

I didn't say anything until we were back in my apartment.

Settled on the couch in our normal position of late, I looked up at him. "I'm fine. I'm recovering," I said.

"I know, but you have no idea what it did to me to see you on that gurney. What it did to Doug. To see you go through surgery. That was the toughest thing I've ever gone through. All I could think about was why this had to happen to you. I desperately wanted to make you better, but I couldn't do a thing. You were so helpless and I couldn't do a thing but be there for you. Hold your hand and wait," Carter said.  
>"I know. I'm just glad you were waiting for me on the other side and that you didn't decide I wasn't worth the trouble," I said, kissing him.<p>

He pulled away and looked at me. "I can't explain this, Maddie, but I feel closer to you than anyone. No one understands me like you do," he said.

"I can't explain it either, but we do know each other pretty well. You get me. You like me for me," I said.

Suddenly his eyes conveyed a seriousness. "I love you for you," he said.  
>I was nearly speechless. I knew how I felt about him, but didn't know if he'd think the same way about me.<p>

I looked in his eyes and said, "I love you for you, too."


	9. Chapter 9

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but Madison. All characters belong to others I cannot remember and are too numerous to mention.

We started kissing again and I found myself wanting more.

I straddled him on the couch and started unbuttoning his shirt. His hands found their way up my back and unhooked my bra and ran his hands along the my back.

He found the sensitive spot on my neck. He was slowly driving me crazy. I leaned forward and whispered in his ear, "Bedroom. Now!"

Carter pulled away and looked at me. He must have liked what he saw conveyed on my face because I found myself being picked up and carried into my bedroom.

Once inside, the door slammed shut and Carter placed me on the bed. "Are you sure," he asked.  
>Without giving him a verbal answer, I grabbed his neck and kissed him.<p>

He stopped and unstrapped the boot on my foot. He made sure I was comfortable before proceeding to strip me of my remaining clothes and I of his.

That night was the best night of my life and Carter, knowing how it was my 'first' time, took his time and was so loving and caring that I never wanted the time to end.

Afterward, Carter and I lay in each others arms, amazed at what had transpired between the two of us.

"Are you OK," he asked, genuine concern in his voice.  
>"I'm fine. Better than fine. Although, I still haven't gotten the feeling back in my legs," I said.<br>Carter smiled. "I don't think I could walk now if I tried, so we're even," he said.  
>He rubbed my arm and placed soft kisses in my hair. I looked up at him and he kissed my nose. "What," he said, knowing the look on my face.<br>"Thank you," I said.  
>"For what," he asked, questioning me.<p>

"For giving me a good memory for my first time," I said.  
>Carter, who was aware of the rape and had been carefully watching me to make sure I wasn't having any flashbacks or any painful memories associated with it.<p>

"Thank you for letting me be that first one," he said, kissing me.  
>I didn't notice at the time, but if I had been looking at his eyes, I would have seen the tears, unshed in his eyes.<p>

I settled back on his chest and fell into a contented sleep.

CARTER'S POV

I rushed out after finishing my shift to meet Madison and Doug at the ortho office. I hoped she'd get her leg cast off today and get the ankle replaced with a walking boot. I also wanted to make sure she was feeling fine and dealing with whatever trauma the rape had imprinted on her she was able to deal. Doug and I were prepared to help her any way we could, but I secretly hoped she'd never have to deal with it.

I took her home after her appointment, stopping to get her favorite Chinese from Golden Wok. I settled her on the couch and got her utensils. We settled down and watched the news on TV before Madison settled into my arms into a position that was becoming a personal favorite.

Then I told her. I couldn't help myself. I had been in love with this woman for at least a year and I had to tell her.

That conversation, those three words were the catalyst that changed our relationship.  
>Loving someone changed the playing field.<p>

The next thing I knew I was carrying Madison to her room and we shared something that was just between the two of us. Something that no one could take away from us.

I nearly lost it however, when she thanked me for being her first.  
>I hated lying to her at that moment, but I knew, if she ever found out, she would forgive me for the lie. For not telling her that her first time had been at the hands of a man hell-bent on nothing but harming her and inflicting pain and taking away that choice.<p>

"What are we going to do tonight? I don't have to be back at that pit for two whole days," I said.  
>Madison looked at me. "You sure you want to spend all that time here? Shouldn't you go home at some point," she asked.<br>"I plan on it. Tomorrow I'm having lunch with Gamma and you're coming with me," I said.  
>Fear flicked across Madison's face. "Lunch with you're grandmother," she said in a quiet, nearly fearful voice.<p>

I kissed her again, trying to waylay her fears. "We've had lunch with her before. Why should it be any different now. She also knows you were in an accident, so you don't have to pretend or anything. She likes you. She things you're great," I said.

"OK," she relented, but the fear remained.

"If I'm having lunch with your grandmother tomorrow, then you're taking me to that restaurant on the pier," she said.  
>I smiled at her. I knew what she meant. I'd taken her to dinner at this restaurant on the pier when my grandparents were holding a charity event. Gamma had insisted I come, so I asked Madison to be my date. I wasn't worried about pressure or pretense with her and we had a wonderful time. During dinner she looked at me and said, "You know, I don't care that you have more money than God, but if it can get me seafood and steak like this, I just might have to abuse my privilege as your best friend."<p>

"You got it, Sonny," I said, kissing her.

MADISON'S POV

I was going to go back to that restaurant on the pier. Yep, being Carter's girlfriend was going to have it's perks. Of course, his grandmother had to like me. She already liked me as John's friend, but now I was his girlfriend.  
>"Sonny? You don't think you can give me a new nickname," I asked.<br>"Well, I call you Mads and Maddie like everyone else, but Sonny's special. It's just mine," he said.

"OK, but if it gets around the ER, I will personally kick you ass," I said.  
>"Oh, another side to Madison Ross. Beauty, brains and an attitude. I just might like that," he said, kissing me again.<p>

That was all it took. Just one kiss and I forgot that I hated the nickname or that I'd asked him to change it. Boy, I was totally gone. But I liked that feeling.

"Madison! You still here," I heard my brother call from the living room. Carter and I were lying in my bed, just listening to music.

Carter got up and opened the door. He went out into the living room to see Doug. "She's napping," he said.

"She doing OK," Doug asked.  
>"Yes. I'm taking her out to dinner tonight," Carter said.<br>Doug eyed Carter warily. "Dinner," he asked.  
>"I told her I'd take her anywhere she wanted. So we're going to the pier for dinner," Carter answered.<br>"Isn't that kind of pricy. And dressy," Doug asked, opening a bottle of water.

"Don't have to worry about the dress, I happen to know the owner and I think I can afford it, but don't tell anyone," Carter said.  
>Doug nodded. I'd briefly told Doug that Carter was loaded but told him I'd do something horrible and painful and humiliating to him if he blabbed a word of it to anyone. He'd kept his mouth shut.<p>

I poked my head out of the bedroom. "I'm going to take a bath. A leisurely bath. You know the last time I took a long bath," I asked.  
>"Good idea, Mads. You're starting to smell up the apartment," Doug said.<br>I rolled my eyes at him.

I'd taken baths and showers, but in my bathing suit. Doug had gotten into the shower with me a few times in his swimming trunks, just to make sure I didn't mess up my leg and ankle. He'd gotten a shower chair and I was able to sit in it, with waterproof bags wrapped around my casts. Carter had also helped me bathe, but not having a cast and being able to remove the boot, I was going to soak my body in some seriously hot water.

Carter poked his head in my bedroom. "You want some help," he asked, his eyebrows rising with suggestion.  
>"Not with Doug here, I don't," I said, smiling suggestively. "How long do I have before we have to go," I asked him.<p>

"Like I told Doug, I know the owner, so take all the time you need. We'll have a private little table all to ourselves," Carter said.

"OK. I'll be out in a little bit," I said.

Carter kissed me and I went into my bathroom.


	10. Chapter 10

DISCLAIMER: Nothing belongs to me except Madison. No disrespect or infringement is intended.

I filled the tub with water that was as hot as I could make it.

I filled it with my favorite lavender bubble bath. I smiled as I sniffed the scent. It had been a Christmas present from Carter the previous Christmas. I was gifted with an entire lavender collection, courtesy of Carter. He found I loved the scent and wanted to get me something he knew I would enjoy and like. I climbed into the tub and sat back and closed my eyes. For the first time in weeks, I felt human.  
>I reached for the soap that was on the side of the tub. I looked at it and realized it was a bar of the soap Doug had purchased and not my normal soft scent. 'Carter must have used it,' I thought to myself. As I put the soap on the tray, I caught a whiff of it.<p>

Suddenly I was back in the parking garage. That scent triggered a memory.

"_I'm going to take it from you," the throaty whisper said. _

_Fear prickled my skin and I tried to back away, do something to get my attacker to leave me alone or call attention to myself and the situation._

"_I'm going to win this round," he said. In that brief __moment, I knew exactly who was attacking me.  
>I called his name.<em>

_I didn't remember anything right before that or right after the trauma._

I stared at the wall. The realization that I had been raped a few weeks before, hit me like a freight train. Being a doctor, I knew that those close to me and participants in my care had mostly likely been made aware of the situation as I laid unconscious on the trauma stretcher.

Suddenly, the detail of what happened to me came rushing in a quick succession of images. It was like a movie on fast forward. I couldn't stop the images, nor could I focus on what they were, exactly.

I sat there. Hugging myself. Wondering what happened to me and, now that I knew, did it change anything.

I sat in the tub. I don't know how long. The scalding water I'd filled the tub with had long since passed the luke warm, tepid, room temperature stage and fallen directly into cold and frigid. Still I sat there. Never registering the temperature change or the pounding on the door.

"Mads, are you OK," Doug asked through the door.  
>I sat there. I started rocking back and forth.<p>

Doug knowing his sister was most likely in trouble, kicked the bathroom door in and found me nearly catatonic.

"Mads," he said, quickly wrapping a towel around me. I was now shivering in the cold bath water.

I continued to stare straight ahead and continued rocking. Doug was at a loss. He was about to gather me up and take me to the hospital, when I finally spoke.

"He raped me. He raped me," I said, repeating the phrase over and over.

"Who did that," Doug asked. They hadn't told me about the rape because I didn't remember that part of my attack. Doug had wanted to vomit when he'd heard the news and then rip the head off of the person that harmed his sister. The entire ER staff felt the same way.

"Mads, we need to get out of here, OK. This water is really cold now and I don't want you to get sick. Can you stand up for me," he asked, his voice keeping it's normal calm tone.

I stood up and let him guide me to my bedroom. He grabbed my robe and put me in it. He went out of the bedroom and returned with Carter.

"Maddie, sweetie, can I help you into these clothes," Carter asked, taking the sweats off the bed. I stared past him but allowed him to take the robe and put the sweatshirt over my head.

"Now, you're going to have to stand up and put these on," Carter said.  
>He helped me stand up and I slipped my feet into my underwear and quickly felt the legs of the sweats come over my legs. He eased me down on the bed to sit, I continued to stare at the wall.<p>

He knelt in front of me. "Sonny, you're scaring everyone. Can you please talk to me," he asked in a near whisper.

"John," I said.

"Yeah, I'm here," he said, taking my hand.  
>"It was Edson," I said.<p>

"What was Edson," he asked.

"He attacked me. It was him. It was the scent and there was something he said. 'I'll take it from you,'" I said, looking at him. "We had that conversation when you asked me out that first time. I told you I didn't have much experience with men," I said, finally meeting his eyes.

Carter's face paled. "I remember that conversation, but I didn't think anyone could hear us," he said.

I looked at the floor. He pulled my face up to his. "Dale has followed you around like a puppy. Always looking for an excuse to get around you. You have to say something," he said.  
>"I can't. No one's going to believe me. They might even think I'm trying to find a way to ruin him because of what happened between him and you," I said.<p>

"I don't care what they say. He raped you. He beat you. You nearly died because of what he did," he said, but suddenly his face paled. "He was part of your surgical team. He helped Benton and Anspaugh. Oh, my God," Carter said.

I started crying. I grabbed onto Carter like a lifeline and he held me. The sensitive man that Carter was, I knew he was crying, too.

CARTER'S POV

"How do you feel about my sister," Doug asked me after Madison went into the bathroom to take her bath.

"I care about her deeply. I like her a lot," I said. I didn't want to admit to the one person I feared that I was in love with her.

Doug looked at me and laughed. "You love her," he said.

"Wha...I..what are you talking about," I stuttered.

Doug continued laughing. "It happens. I love her. She's a great gal," he said.  
>"She's also your sister," I said.<p>

"But I still think she's great," Doug said.

"Fine. I do love her. I enjoy spending time with her. I just hate what happened to her," I said.  
>Doug and I made small talk, which was a bit unusual for me.<p>

A half an hour after she went into the bathroom, I questioned Doug about the length of time she'd been gone.  
>"Do you think she's OK," I asked.<p>

Doug looked at the clock and I guess the amount of time Maddie had been in there was a bit long for him and for her.  
>He knocked on the door.<p>

I sat on the couch, trying to assure myself that everything was fine, but I was worried she'd tried to use her foot and it had caused her to fall.

Doug kicked in the bathroom door and called out, "CARTER."

I rushed to Madison's room and headed toward the bathroom. I heard Doug talking softly to her, trying to get her out of the cold water in the tub. He ushered me into the bathroom, believing I might have better luck with her.

I talked to her and managed to get her changed into her sweats. I held her as she stared at the wall, not blinking. When she finally spoke and told me she knew Edson was the one who had raped her, two things that shocked me to the core. One that she remembered the rape and two that someone we both knew. I wanted nothing more than to run out of the apartment, find Dale and beat him senseless. I wanted to hurt him for everything he'd done to Madison. The problem was, I didn't know why he had done it and if he was responsible for the other attacks in and around the hospital area.

Madison held onto me. The pain I felt for her at that moment was nearly crippling.

Doug stood in the room, looking like a third wheel. I motioned for him to step out of the room. I planned to get Madison settled down and then I'd talk to him about a plan.

That's when Madison told me she wasn't going to say anything to anyone. I urged her to rethink that.  
>"You have to tell the police. They're still looking for your attacker," I told her.<p>

"What if they use our relationship against us and say I'm only doing it because of the trouble he tried to cause for you when you were working together," she said.

"I can handle whatever they say about my career, but I know you're telling me the truth. Everyone that works with us, is going to believe you," I told her.

She was silent for the longest time. I held her and waited for her to speak again.

"Do you hate me," she whispered. It was so quiet I almost didn't catch it.  
>"What are you talking about? I don't hate you. As I recall, I told you this afternoon that I loved you," I told her.<p>

"Even after this," she asked.  
>I knew what she was wondering. Did her rape have anything to do with how I felt about her.<p>

I wrapped my arms around her again and kissed her forehead. "Sonny, knowing what happened to you, broke my heart. Don't be mad for us not telling you. We wanted to save you from the pain," I told her.  
>Madison didn't say anything. She curled herself up into my side and closed her eyes.<p>

When she was sleeping, I slipped out of her arms and headed into the living room.

"How is she," Doug asked.  
>"She fell asleep," I told him.<br>Doug turned around and headed into the kitchen. "Dammit," he said, slamming his fist into the counter.

"That puny little worm! I'm gonna kill him," he said.

"No you won't. Maddie will kill you if you get into trouble," I said. "Do we call the police?"

"Yeah. And Mads is going to tell them what happened," Doug said.  
>"What if she doesn't want to," I asked him.<br>"Why wouldn't she," Doug questioned.  
>"She's afraid they will think it's because of that incident between Dale and me," I told him.<br>"The allergy thing," Doug asked and I nodded.

"She's going to tell them what happened. That's not up for discussion," Doug said.  
>I nodded and he made the call to the detective that was investigating Madison's case.<p>

"He's coming right over," Doug said.  
>I nodded and went back into Madison's room and placed her back in my arms.<p> 


	11. Chapter 11

DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to NBC and a few others that I can't remember. I do own the character of Madison.

MADISON'S POV

I eventually told the police the story of my rape and accused the person behind it. That wasn't the hardest part. The hardest part, was facing him when he actually admitted what he did.

I struggled through the entire process, but I knew it wasn't easy on Carter. It was very difficult on me.

We continued dating throughout our residency.

Our relationship wasn't anything special. At least not to anyone but ourselves. We loved spending time together and having fun, but I'm sure most thought it was pretty boring. But I was happy.

Carter and I learned the ropes as physicians. When he decided to change to an Emergency residency, everyone was shocked. But not me. I knew Carter's heart was in Emergency medicine. I knew he chose surgery because he thought it offered the prestige that was in line with the Carter family name. I'd tried to tell him to carve his own path and, by becoming an ER doctor, he was doing just that.

I loved the thought of working with him. I even enjoyed the fact that I was going to be a year ahead of him as an R2.

Walking into the ER his first day as a resident was interesting. Carter had complained because Maggie and I were the higher ranking residents.

"Carter, good to have you join us. Why don't you get a patient, do a work up and then discuss it with either Maggie or Madison," Mark said.  
>"What! I'm an R2, just like them," he complained.<br>Mark started to object, but I held up my hand. "Carter, if you had stayed a surgical resident, you would be an R2. Right now, you're a lowly R1 because the clock starts all over again when you start a new residency," I said, unable to hide the glee in my voice.

Carter looked at Mark. "She's right," Mark said.  
>"She's always right," Carter muttered under his breath which earned him a smack on the back from my wonderful brother. "You knew that when you started dating her. Nothing new there," he said.<p>

I watched him pout as I handed him a chart and he went off to see his patients.  
>"Why do I get the feeling that you're going to enjoy this, Maddie," Mark asked.<br>"Because I am," I said, smiling.

"I never thought I'd tell my sister this, but go easy on the guy. Don't want to see it ruin your relationship," Doug said.

I smiled at Doug. "You're the last one to give me relationship advice," I told him.

I went about my shift seeing patients and presenting to whichever attending was available.

I worked very diligently about not letting my duties as an upper-level resident come between Carter and myself.

He helped me move into the town house that my father had given me for graduation. When I went to take possession, I discovered that dad had acquired the house in a business deal and promptly put the deed in my name. He hoped it would keep anyone from taking it from him.

It was the one thing my father did that didn't have an ulterior motive.

Carter spent a lot of time with me and I was seriously thinking I'd found the guy I was meant to be with for the rest of my life. Little did I know that life in general, not any unforseen or unknown intrusion would tear our lives apart.


End file.
